Recently my husband lost 40 lbs in just a few months. He will tell you that I was a huge part of the reason why he was able to lose the weight! I wanted to write this as an encouragement for other wives who want to help their husbands lose weight also!
First and most importantly,
I never asked my husband to lose weight.
If you are reading this because your husband is overweight and you want him to be healthier, I’m sorry but this might not be so helpful for you. All of my husbands goals were 100% his own and I was his support. Actually, I wanted him to take it a little easier on the working out and not lose the weight too fast.
My HUSBAND was the one who wanted to lose weight and I was simply the support who made it possible for him. Some of these suggestions might work if your husband is not motivated on his own, but I would not suggest asking him to lose weight as this would probably be very damaging to your relationship. In fact, I have never asked my husband to lose weight, even when he was 100 lbs more than he is now. These suggestions are meant as a way to support your husband who is already motivated to lose weight, not to get him motivated.
This next one was actually very hard for me:
I never faulted him for going to the gym.
Most wives would be delighted for their husbands to work out, but it was a quality time issue that I really struggled with . His work out times directly impacted our family time and that was very difficult for me. The way that I primarily experience love is through the time that my husband spends with me, so for him to dedicate a large portion of that to going to the gym has sometimes been a source of contention. If your husband wants to dedicate a portion of your time together to getting healthier, imagine how much more time he will have to love on you because of his longer, healthier life in the future!
An even better suggestion for some couples might be to find a workout that you can do together. This didn’t work for us because my husband is the only one with a gym membership and he is motivated to do incredibly hard work out classes that I am not interested in (and probably couldn’t do!) The least that I could do was to allow him that time (and encourage him when he didn’t feel like going). I did not make him feel badly for going to the gym and I did not guilt or beg him to go.
I made him healthy food.
I can’t stress enough that all of my husbands goals and decisions were his. He decided the amount of weight that he wanted to lose, the time period, the diet he wanted to have, and how often he wanted to work out. I am a stay at home mom and one of my jobs is to grocery shop and cook our dinner every night so that we don’t have the expense of going out or convenience foods. I already cook whole foods from scratch, but I made extra effort to provide more salads and nutritious foods, some quality protein in every meal, and higher levels of healthy fats. It was actually good for the entire family! Every night, I could feel good telling him to go ahead and have seconds of dinner because it was good, healthy food! I also prepared him a protein breakfast smoothie each evening that he could just blend and take to work in the morning. (Now the whole family has smoothies for breakfast every day!)
If you don’t have time to cook every night, cook one healthy meal in a double or triple portion that your husband can eat throughout the week. Also, prepare or purchase healthy easy snacks for the whole week. Figure out which are the unhealthy foods that tempt your husband, and keep them out of the house. Do whatever you can to avoid going out. If there is healthy food in your house and you don’t go out, you can’t make poor diet choices. Sorry, you can’t order dessert here, I didn’t make any!
I did his laundry.
Okay, I already do the laundry, but when my husband is working out, there is a lot more laundry…. Like double. I never complained about the extra laundry because I knew what he was doing for his health and our family. If I wasn’t caught up on the laundry, I would check that he had clean work out clothes before he went to the gym. I wasn’t perfect, sometimes he had to pull them directly out of the dryer, but he never missed a class due to no proper clothes! Staying motivated to work out is hard enough, if you are not the one who usually does the laundry, I suggest at least washing the work out clothes for your husband. Or even just buy more pairs of workout clothes so that you have plenty of clean clothes to last the entire week of workouts.
There were obviously way more important and hard choices that my husband made. He worked hard every day to lose the weight and be healthier, but I’m taking credit for being his number 1 support. If your husband wants to make changes that will benefit his health (and remember that his benefit is ultimately your benefit), find out what obstacles he is going to face and knock down as many as possible as you can for him!
You can’t run for him, but you can buy him a really cool water bottle and fill it with ice water before he runs.
You can’t get up early for him, but you can get up early with him
You can’t eat the healthy food for him, but you can make something super delicious and healthy for him.
You can be his number 1 cheerleader and make it possible for him to reach his healthy goals, whatever they are!
Please note that I am not a medical professional and I am not certified to give any medical or health advice. This post is written for inspirational and educational purposes only. The information provided on this blog is purely from my personal experience, and may not be right for you. Please contact your healthcare professional to help you make your own health and wellness decisions
Have you ever tried to make healthy changes? What support would you have wanted from your family?